boxed

I've been boxing up the apartment for the past few weeks (slowly and lazily), and the past couple days things have been less homey and housey- but the place I've loved and slaved over making ours is suddenly feeling emptier and emptier.




It's kind of a hollow place now. The walls that were once vibrant colors, shelves filled with our things- now the picture frames are all stacked and covered in bubble wrap, the walls are primed in a stark white leaving our place feeling like it's not ours anymore.

I leave for LA this coming weekend... and I'm just feeling the pangs of leaving a life (no matter how unrooted) that we've started together.

This is our place.

Now jimmy is moving into a little one bedroom here in Dallas with a short lease while I go out to LA and get a freaking job.

It's not really the traditional "honeymoon period" of the marriage... it's making us both try and savor the time we spend together.





It's making us both remember the long distance thing we've done before. How hard it really is.

I don't know how it is for men in a long distance relationship.

For me, and maybe other women, it's hard because of the little stuff. It's hard because of the loneliness that comes from not being able to tell them how your day went face to face, or share dinner with, or cuddle with while watching the new house.

It's silly and honestly inconsequential in the long run for a few months of separation... but it's sore none the less.

But it's all worth it. I know we are making the best choices for us, we are embarking on a big adventure together- even if we're not physically together for a little while- we are in this together and it's pretty exciting. I kind of love and hate the feeling of change. It's so scary... and at the same time exhilarating and it makes me feel full of so much.